In Translation

So our dossier is in the process of translation. I can only imagine how exhausting the ordeal of translating English into Bulgarian is. Wow.

We've been told this could take some time (4-6 weeks) and when it is complete we will be sent off to the Ministry to be registered. Once registered it could be any time. We highly doubt we will receive a referral before this summer. Maybe we will be surprised but I doubt it.

Lily has named her brother. She is calling him by this name. I really like the name, Garry does not. He seems to always find a way to make fun of the name (just as boys will do with all boy names, simply because they are boys) I've told Garry no matter the name we choose, our son's friends will find a way to tease him for his name. There is no 'nickname-proof' name for a guy.

Waiting game begins...

So our dossier was shipped off to Bulgaria 2 weeks ago. We're still waiting to hear if they received it. But while we wait there are plenty of things to do here.

Thanksgiving was ok. Different, but ok. Pop and the Polks were here in Memphis and the kids enjoyed their time playing together. Paige attempted her first turkey and was successful...even if we had no idea what was inside the turkey. The boys played video games or watched football while we cooked up a storm.

The dinner table was hard. If mom were here we would have sat at the table for hours and talked, munching on the food and going back to munch some more. That will be something I miss terribly.

We have the knowledge that nothing will ever be like it was when Momma was here but that knowledge is still head knowledge and not heart. Holidays will be tough. I'm almost ashamed to say that I am dreading Christmas. In one ear I have God telling me I shouldn't dread it and I'm promptly yelling back (in my head, of course) smart remarks like "Well, you shouldn't have taken my momma!"

It's normal, luckily. Of course, I've never been considered totally normal anyway so why should I try to be now.

Lily and Mia have started gymnastics and both enjoy the exercise. I get to "help" assist Mia in her class and she's so funny because she pushes my hands away. "No momma, No," she says. Funny thing.

OH and Lily's favorite saying "Shake your Booty" has become her sister's as well.. Mia says "Sake you OOty" though...

FBI Clearance

Just waiting on the FBI Clearance Letter to come back. It's been 10 weeks. If it's not back next week, they will be getting a call from a friend of Garry's. Ha.

Everything else is sent away to our agency. Oh wait, not the marriage license, but we will send that off tomorrow.

The girls have both been sick with croup and ear infections so we've stayed around the house a bit more than usual. And the time change has throw us all for a loop...9 o'clock rolls around and I can barely keep my eyes open.

So...

Garry went to Nashville today and was able to get almost everything apostilled. We have to go to MS to get the marriage license notarized and apostilled, and we went ahead and sent the almost expired FBI Clearance letters and should have the new ones within a few weeks. We are in agreement that we just want to get everything out of our hands and into our agency's so we can breathe a bit.

Amen to that! Lily has her last soccer game of the season tomorrow with a pizza party after. That should be fun...

Dossier Physical

So Garry and I went for adoption physicals today. Craziness! You have to have the dossier physical form notarized! Here in the South we don't have notaries in all the Doctors offices; only in banks, post-offices, and places of business. So the wonderfully sweet people down at Faith Family Medical called the local bank and they've agreed to send someone to notarize the form for free!! So awesome! Love them!

So that should be ready at some point today. Then all we have to do is get the paperwork notarized, then notarized again by the county, then appostilled. Piece of cake! ; p

News: The Bad and the Good

Sheryl, my sweet precious mom, went to be with the Lord on Sept 16, 2010. Her pain is gone and she is in His presence now. I miss her more than words can say but I'm reminded of God's goodness through my pain.

Today we received our approval for adoption from Immigration. I wanted nothing more to tell her, to call her and be excited with her. I have to believe that she knows, because I believe that she already knows our son. I believe she walks every path with me and will until the time I see her again.

On a lighter note, we have a new (smaller) addition to the family. Her name is Molly. She is a 4 months old Shichon puppy and she is precious! She is so sweet, loving and playful. My dad bought her for the girls as a healing present more than anything. Lily even told me "Pop didn't want my heart to hurt so he gave me a puppy, and now my heart doesn't hurt as much". From the mouths of babes...

Fingerprinting done

So we both completed our Immigration fingerprinting. So easy. Took 10 minutes for each of us.

We did have to send off our second FBI clearance letters. The six months is almost up and we haven't gotten approved by immigration yet.

Mom is not doing well. She has been in the CCU for 21 days now with pneumonia and ARDS. The next 24 hours are crucial. Her kidneys have started shutting down and with all the complications with her lungs, signals the beginning of the end.

My prayer is that God will either take her home with Him or let us take her home. My knowledge tells me the first will occur soon.

I know my mom was excited about meeting her grandson. I know that will never happen. But it will not stop me from telling him someday about how determined she was that we continue the adoption process after her cancer diagnosis in May.

I think her determination and her love for her children and her grandchildren will prevail long after she is gone. We will keep them alive.

School Days

Lily started school last Thursday...she was only put in time-out twice on that day, once on Friday, and luckily...not once today

She told me as we were driving home:

"I was a good girl today Momma"
"I'm so glad Lily! That makes me so happy."
"I CHOSE to be a good girl today"
"Well that's good...I think"

Kids...Mia is having a hard time adjusting to "Sissy" being gone for the morning. She wanders the house calling her name and then comes back to me and says "Sissy gone gone"

We're praying she adjusts. She starts a MDO program in September so hopefully that will help when she goes to the same place as Lily for two mornings a week.

Also Lily started soccer practice this weekend and will have practice twice a week for a month. She did great and said she had a good time...


PRAISE:
My mom got an amazing report from the doctor last week. According to her new PET she is free of all living cancer cells! Living being the key word...so they are still continuing chemo to rid her body of those little suckers! Then in November they will re-evaluate and decide whether to do the surgery then.

Let's just pray it stays dead! NO ZOMBIE CANCER!

Oh, and we have finally completed our adoption online training...after a horrible experience with one of them (no names)

So we are just waiting on the word from immigration...waiting...patiently...tapping finger as a type..just kidding

So I will leave you with some Lillisms:

Last night, lying in bed with her daddy.

Don't go daddy!
Why Lily
Because there are monster in my tummy
In your tummy?
Yes, and they live in my tummy and they come out of my nose and they play with me and then they go into my closet and they come out.
Really?
Yes, and then they have to have a tea party
Oh?
Yeah, and they have to have cupcakes, and cookies
Uh huh...Go to sleep Lily.
But Daddy, I'm scared.
Of the monsters that live in your tummy?
Yeah and they come out of my nose and they play with me.................


You get the picture.

Back after a loooonggg summer...

So, good news and bad...

Bad I'll do first:

My mom was diagnosed with Stage IV Breast Cancer in June of 2010. She is currently undergoing chemo every week for 1 year to hopefully treat it...then she will have to take a pill for the rest of her life.

It has been a trying and horrible time. God is good and we constantly have to remind ourselves of that..Sometime we don't understand why things happen...and may never have the opportunity...but they still happen...be it "SIN" or "the Devil" himself...we just don't know.

She has, however refused to allow us to stop the adoption process...So that brings us to a bit of good news...

We are just waiting to receive approval from Immigration and then we will be ready to submit the Dossier..then the real waiting begins...

Lily starts school at ECS next week and then Mia will start a MDO program there in Sept. I am going to use that time to complete my thesis.

It is strange how God leads us to things...My thesis is on grief and trauma through literature....I've read all the books...Elizabeth Kubler Ross and Jon Allen, among many others, that discuss how to deal and cope and with the realization that a loved-one is dying or seriously ill. I've been researching this for 2 years now. Strange and ironic...

Now, to lighten the mood!

We had a nice vacation to Antigua, just Garry and Me...We spent a week relaxing and sunning by the beach and pool. We realize this may be the last opportunity for a vacation for the 2 of us for many years. Hopefully Our next 2 "Holidays" will  be to Bulgaria!

Home Study Over!!!

Yea!!! We are through with the Home Study..well, Ok...our part. The loads of paperwork and such. Now we just have to wait for our Social Worker to write her report, send it to the agency for approval and then on to Immigration. Then a long wait. We've been told 10 weeks to 3 months. Of course, we basically have everything ready for the dossier (paperwork) and will just be waiting for USCIS approval.

So summer is here..hot hot.. so the girls and I have enjoyed the weather and spent as much time as allowed outside. 1 bottle of sunscreen down, 3 to go before we stock up again.

I'm looking forward to holiday in June. Can't wait to go to Palm Island...snorkeling, sun, sailing, swimming, sleeping in, etc...
Need it...
Plus we've heard the Grenadines is gorgeous.

Mia has entered the "terrible twos" phase and is no replying to ever question, statement, or comment "No"

Lily is obsessed with the iPhone apps for kids. I guess it's good for her dexterity and brain...I can only guess...Ha

Not much other than that.

Almost through...I think

Tomorrow we have our individual interviews with our social worker. Not sure what else they can ask but I'm determined to make her laugh either way.

Mia has hit the "terrible-twos" I'm afraid and now says "NO" "Uh UH" "Waaaaa" and "ahhhhhh" on a regular basis.

Lily is learning how to deal with such precarious behavior. She said today "Momma, Mia hit me!"
I asked what she did and she said "I ran in here to where you are."

Mia has begun to hit, bite, and pull anything that resembles human hair. Love this stage.

So while finishing up with the thesis, and dealing with two opposite creatures, Garry and I are planning a holiday..yeah!!!!!

So excited. I'll leave you with some general Lillisms

Lily: Momma why are the people riding their back (her reactions to the Wonder Pets onstage)

Mia: WAAA
Lily: I didn't do it. I was over here. (as she runs to the other couch)

Mia: Yiyi!! (Lily)
Lily: Mia I'm busy you'll have to come back later. Or you can leave me a message.

Been awhile

Yes, it's been awhile. We have had tons going on but luckily we have almost finished all of the required paperwork for the home study and have begun working on the dossier paperwork, which actually isn't that much stuff.

I did get my new passport with my married name so that part is taken care of. I think one of the last things we have to do is take the girls to get physicals. I am of course waiting for one to get sick so we don't have to make an extra trip. (Is that mean?)

Oh well, today is an amazing day!

One of my college girlfriends and her husband have just signed the paperwork required to adopt their precious baby girl. After struggling with years of infertility, they felt God lead them to adopt domestically from Utah.

They began the process in September of 2009 and as of today have a brand new baby girl. They are beside themselves with happiness and I know they will be the best parents and spoil her to the brink.
(as they should)

I can't wait to meet her!

Lillisms and the start of many Miaisms

Lily gets in the bed in the middle of the night: 
Lily: Momma, I wanna cuddle. 
Garry: But I wanna cuddle 
Lily: Uh uh, You not supposed to cuddle with boys. 
Garry: But you can cuddle with daddy...and Pop 
Lily: No Daddy, Pop doesn't cuddle, He snores.


Mia wants yogurt
Mia: I wont dat! 
Me: Ok get your spoon and go sit in your chair.
Mia gets the spoon out of the drawer and goes to sit in the chair. The chair is on it's side because she likes to climb on the table. 
I put the chair to the table.
Mia climbs in. Bangs her spoon on the table
Mia: YOYUR!!!!!!!!!! (YOGURT)
Me: Ok, calm down here it is. 
Mia: Tant too! (thank you)

Top Ten

SO We met with our social worker (wonderful) and she gave us ALL the forms to fill out. ALL being the key words. Garry makes a good point. You don't have to do everything that is require for adoption when you're having a baby. There is something very wrong with that picture.

Top Ten Things you don't have to have/do when having a baby but must when adopting that you should have to do when having a baby:

1. Have health insurance. When the reality is all you have to do is cancel it after the adoption is final. (Not that this is problem for us)

2. Provide every address of every place you've ever lived for background checks. Not to mention the fingerprinting for FBI clearance.

3. Provide a 13 page family background questionnaire. (per person)

4. Have references.

5. Provide all financial information as well as a monthly budget.

6. Meet with experts in pediatric psychology (basically)

7. Read books on parenting. (To be fair I think some do this)

8. Provide photos of your home and everything in and around it. Provide photos of yourself.

9. Submit to a physical exam. (Enough said)

10. Pay out of pocket. (Can't use medicaid or insurance)

Just something to think about.

So...

We are currently working out an interagency agreement I think and then the Home Study agency will be checking references.

So, just waiting on that. Well and we will hopefully start on the dossier this week or next.

Saw a 20/20 special on Haiti last night. Spent the next hour crying. Thank you so much 20/20.

Of course they followed an adoptive family who were worried sick wondering if their daughter was alive and well. Of course they documented the reunion. Viewership went up 5 points I'm sure.

I am thankful that the US is allowing those already pledged to families here to be granted temporary asylum until their adoptions are complete. But I can't help wondering how insincere that is. What about the other children? What about the ones not in orphanages? What about the ones who have just become orphans?

My heart goes out. I can't begin to understand what the government thinks (though I tend to think they don't)

As a mother I can't imagine...

Coming soon...

So we made it back, alive, from Park City. We had a great time but really missed the girls. We're thinking this will be the last time we vacation for that long without them (excluding the trips to Bulgaria). Every time we saw little girls on the slopes we thought of them...we thought that's Lily (crying to go home or just play in the snow) and that's Mia (crying to ski faster and do the black runs at age 2)

It is so funny to think of the differences between two children who are biologically related. The girls look nothing alike and act nothing alike. It's strange to think that our son will fit right in, but hey, if the shoe fits.

So we have filled out most of the formal application for the home study agency and will then get to work! Woo hoo!

Lily: When I have a brother, he has to play with boy toys and he can't play with girl toys.
Me: Why is that?
Lily: (giving me the classic-out-the-corner-of-the-eye-look) Because he's a boy.